Jon Snow knows nothing illustration

Jon Snow knows nothing, nada, zilch

Jon Snow off of Game of Thrones doesn’t know a great deal (it is known). The surly Lord Commander of the Watch and all round fact avoider could do with raising his interest game better, maybe hit the Encylopedia Britannica or Wikipedia a bit more. It might prevent him being more of a misery guts. Here are some things Jon Snow doesn’t know:

  • How to tell the sex of a guinea pig
  • How radar works
  • How much he pays for his broadband
  • What an ocarina is
  • The difference between a flan and a quiche
  • Which one is the fish knife
  • How to complete a tax return
  • How to avoid sharp objects

This illustration and animation demonstrates Jon Snow at his most wise and considered.

On Spoilers [which also has spoilers]

It’s been a right arse avoiding spoilers for this season of Game of Thrones. Even though we don’t have a telly and I’ve avoided Facebook and Twitter for the last few episodes, you could still find out some major plot points thanks to some scenes (especially with regards to Sansa Stark). Who knows what sort of feverish lengths we’ll have to go to when Season 6 starts in a year or so.

Other notes:

  • The scenes in Dorne were a bit flat and joyless for the most part. They also seemed tonally different to the rest of the series, I kept thinking Kevin Sorbo was going to turn up and slap his thigh heartily.
  • What a glum festival of misery the last few episodes have been.
  • Watching Cersei make veiled threats and slurp down some wine reminds me of the episode of The Simpsons where Marge tries to keep up with the snooty country club ladies.
  • When Daenarys rides off on the dragon at the end of episode nine, all I could think of was this:

The Neverending Story

Poster from the excellently readable Film on Paper

Updated: - written by Ed Clews

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